Pocket Jesus

Dan

Are you tired of losing political arguments day after day? Are you tired of being shut down by facts or owned by snarky comebacks? Then we have the perfect product for you. The Pocket Jesus. Pocket Jesus is a figurine small enough to go in your pocket, but big enough to make a statement. When you feel cornered on your side of the debate, simply take out your Pocket Jesus, remove it from its protective sheath, and display it to your opponent. The argument is over, and you are the victor. No one argues with Jesus. Watch your political adversary slink away in shame as you defeat their well-calculated statement with Pocket Jesus. Refugee debate? Pocket Jesus. Welfare Reform? Pocket Jesus. 2nd Amendment? Anti-Trump? Pro-Trump? Pocket Jesus. Pocket Jesus. Pocket Jesus. Works every time from any perspective without any need to actually commit to the faith. Worried your Pocket Jesus won’t pack enough punch? Got you covered. Accessorize. Wouldn’t Pocket Jesus look great in a MAGA hat? We think so. An “I’m with Her” shirt? We’ve got those too. Any cause, any agenda – all in in the convenience of your pocket. Superficial religion at your fingertips so that you can claim moral and divine authority, without having to consider anything theological. Pocket Jesus. If you don’t have one, get one. ​