Get Ready Pagans: Christmas is Back

Dan

The War on Christmas has ended. Political prisoners have been released and once again, all Americans can utter the words, “Merry Christmas!” without being thrown into a labor camp. It’s been a long road for American Christians, so get ready pagans, Christmas is back with a vengeance. Step aside heathens, we’re celebrating December 25th like it’s the day Jesus was actually born on, and we’re bringing it hard. The years of darkness have passed, and the shackles have been removed. Iraqi Christians may have had their churches fire bombed, but they’ll never know the pain of a Walmart greeter saying “Happy Holidays!” instead of “Merry Christmas!” Christians are stoned in Iran, but at least they don’t have to suffer through fights over nativity scenes on public property. Christian activists are being arrested and murdered in China, but we, the few and the proud, had to suffer through Starbucks not having Christmas designs on their cups. Nevermind the gospel, Jesus was born so we could drink our $5 mocha lattes in paper cups with “Merry Christmas” printed on them, and no one is taking that away from us. Onward Christian soldiers. I imagine the rest of the world could learn a thing a two from us. Superficial faith, after all, is the easiest faith. ​