Open letters can be entertaining. I sometimes enjoy reading them. If you, dear reader, are familiar with the concept (and I know you are), you’ll be aware it is a format primarily used for expressing displeasure with a person or policy without actually addressing the person or persons responsible for the policy. In other words, it is a way to troll someone via ‘sublog.’ One might think of it as a subtweet, but without the 140-character limitation.
To begin, let us define the term:
a letter, often critical, addressed to a particular person or group of people but intended for publication.
So we see it is a method of expressing displeasure with a person or group of people without actually addressing the target of one’s ire directly, but making sure as many other people see it as possible. There are few reasons I can imagine why one wouldn’t address their subject directly. Either one is fearful of addressing the perceived antagonist, one has no method of directly contacting said antagonist, or one simply wants to bellyache about the person in public. It is this last reason I address here. The vainglorious, self-important “celebrities” who might be able to gain access through other channels (or have no desire to) but wish to make noise to impress some audience or other.
This is the first “open letter” I have ever written. I prefer to address the objects of my frustrations directly and without anonymity. You might think I write this anonymously because I call myself LunaticRex and you don’t know my actual name, which is Chris Boone, Msgt, USAF (Ret). So we’ve got that sorted. Anyway, a lot of people who think they are important because they sing songs or write books or get parts in movies or… whatever it is they do (looking at you, Yoko Ono), have been writing ‘open letters’ about Donald Trump getting elected to the office of President of the United States. And that’s fine, of course. This is America, and we can say what we like.
I write this to say this: Shut up. Quit your bitching. The only people who are listening to your constant whining are already on your side. You are preaching to the choir, as it were. The “open letter” is meant to be read by everyone, but you are writing it to solidify your position among your fans as a ‘warrior’ for your position, which every one of your acolytes already shares. So you’re wasting your time, their time, and our time. You’re just making public your irritation with the fact that you didn’t get your desired outcome. It is tiring to those of us who actually understand the Constitution and know that you are simply complaining that you didn’t get your way this time. We don’t care what you think. Your guy lost. It happens. Leave the window-lickers alone. At least they do windows.
If you want to be heard, if you want to make a difference, engage with people with whom you disagree. Sitting in your comfortable nest writing ‘open letters’ into the wild blue yonder means nothing. You know that. Or you should. You silly people are always telling us you’re more intelligent than everyone else because you went to college or you’re pretty, or you’re famous, or you make a ton of money or all of the above. But if you don’t have the courage of your convictions, none of we ‘everyday Americans’ really care what you think.
I guess I shouldn’t waste this space on ‘celebrities.’ None of them will read this, and even if they did, most are too stupid and/or self-interested to take any of it to heart. Just read Federalist 68 and the 12th Amendment to the Constitution of the United States.
It is alright if all you ever do is bitch or pander to try to increase your fan base. As mentioned, this is America. The First Amendment protects your right to be a silly douche bag all you like. But if you don’t want to be thought of as nothing more than a clown in posterity, you might reconsider writing these ‘open letters’ and actually address the object of your alleged dissatisfaction.
Stop being pussies. Or don’t. Your call.
Just a gaggle of people from all over who have similar interests and loud opinions mixed with a dose of humor. We met on Twitter.