A Mother’s Day Message to the GOP

Rebecca de Winter

Today is my 19th Mother’s Day. I’m raising three kids and along the way I’ve learned more than I could ever describe in a blog post, a book, or even 100 books.  

One thing I’m particularly proud to boast is that my children are thoughtful, kind, well-mannered and gracious. Of course they aren’t perfect, no person ever is, but they have self-respect and dignity. They generally make good, responsible decisions. I can’t take credit for all of that – I couldn’t have done it without their dad, for one thing – but I do have some good ideas about how to guide little humans.

Too many in the GOP are currently behaving like spoiled children having a monstrous tantrum. I’d like to offer a few thoughts from a mother’s perspective:

• Children will have tantrums – it’s normal. It doesn’t make you a bad parent. How you choose to respond to tantrums is critical, however.
• If you beg your tantruming child to please stop, because they are embarrassing you, odds are they will ignore you, embarrassing you even more because now you look like a fool – a parent begging a child is one of the most pathetic, weak scenarios imaginable.
• Also, if you beg – you are giving them power over you, which they will wield unreasonably.
• If you offer candy or toys to placate them, congratulations. You have just taught them that screaming, crying and acting like a jackass works, and is in fact rewarded.
• If you do that ridiculous “count to three” trick, you will still look like a fool. You’re giving them permission to ignore you (especially if you do that silly “2 ½, 2, 1 ½, bit). You’re teaching them to ignore you.

Seems hopeless at this point, right? Fear not, there is a remedy. It has worked with all of my children (even the special needs ones) and all of the children of my friends who do the same:

• Say “This is not OK.”
• Walk away (naturally you hide around a corner so you can keep an eye on them if you’re in a public place – but you still walk away).
• The screams may (probably will) intensify at this point but you must hold the line.
• Ignore them.
• Under NO circumstances do you give in.
• Even if strangers stare disapprovingly (and oh they will), you DO. NOT. GIVE. IN.

This is simple, but not easy. You have to have an iron will, a steely resolve, and the ability to not care what other people think. However, the rewards are more than worth it. Eventually (and your mileage may vary on time frame), your child will learn that Mom and Dad do not ever tolerate fits (and that’s never. Not even once). The result is a child who forms legitimate respect for Mom and Dad, and the solid gold life lesson that acting like a little monster never ends well or gives them what they demand.

So, back to you, GOP. As a veteran mom, I’m watching you, and I notice that some of you are giving in to the tantrums of a childish, ill-mannered, unreasonable electorate.

It’s time to tell them: “This is not OK.” Ignore them. Walk away. Hold the line.

You’re welcome. And Happy Mother’s Day.